Has anyone ever been to a liberry? You know…that building where you find thousands of books that can be read for FREE. If you have never visited a liberry, than ask an ignorantic for a tour. They know all about the liberry because it’s their special place; in fact, it’s their word. They made it; and what is ironic about this particular ignorantic is that it is used to describe a place (library) where people go to read, view and listen to literary and artistic materials, such as books, periodicals, newspapers, pamphlets, prints, records, and tapes for FREE. So why does the ignorantic mispronounce the depository that can cure them of their ailment? The answer is simple. They don’t know.
They don’t know, but can then be taught to know better? Can they be cured so they can use the library and be freed from this life of catastrophic mispronunciations. Sure. Let’s use the Google cheat sheet again, and type the word “liberry”. Would it shock you to learn that the search results are “did you mean library?” If you count yourself in the group of people who don’t belong to the ignorantic sect, than you are not shocked by these results…they may be results to you, but to an ignorantic, they are a revelation.
Liberry could possibly be #2 on my list, behind “pacific”, of “Top Ignorantic Terms” because everyone says it from time to time. Children, particularly toddlers, when they begin speaking say liberry. It is cute, and you lovingly correct them as they begin their battle through phonics. However, on an adult, it is not cute, it’s ignorant! I hear it everyday and the only way to break the cycle (after you have Googled it, of course) is to look at the word. L I B R A R Y. Look at it. Look really hard. Do you see where some smart ass dropped in an “R”, and rocked your world (I’m talking to the ignorantics now)? You have to pronounce that “R”. You can’t “pass” on it; it’s required. So, go ahead…say it…L I [B R A R Y]…It’s getting easier now, right? I’m glad I could help.
© 2010.
Your blogs are sheer brillance! DO know that Ignorantics are not confined to your community by any means. I've recently formed a partnership (actually an L.L.C.) with five people in an effort to produce a multi-million dollar TV show, and recently received a group email from one of them who wrote: "I herd the meeting was cancelled." Obviously, he falls into an as-yet unidentified category of Ignorantics, but as you can imagine.... the email prompted a flurry of hilarious emails between those of us who caught it... and all of our emails had one comment in common: How did this person get to where he is today?!?!?
ReplyDeleteAstounding.
Keep up the great work. I'm hooked!
Billy
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My mother used to say don't eat LIBERRIES! They're poisonous! LOL
ReplyDeleteHarold
This "word" used to really confuse me in elementary school when other kids said it. Along with "ambalamps". LOL!
ReplyDelete@Harold...that little anecdote your mother used is hilarious and wonderfully instructional.
ReplyDelete@Carla...LOL!!! I have not heard "ambalamps" since I was in grade school! That gave me an ignorantic flashback!
ReplyDeleteLove this . . . shaking my head and laughing out loud.
ReplyDeleteYou all have me on the floor laughing. I am going to go up the SKREET to my home...Good bye.
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