Ignorantics is speech, written and oral, derived from ignorance and the act of expression is the "antics". This blog is dedicated to the Ignorantics who are casual and chronic offenders. In this blog, I will share stories and commentary about individuals who find themselves in either of these categories. I would also like to inform my readers that all of the stories that I share on this Blog are “REAL” stories but the names of the Ignorantics have been changed to protect the ignorant! © 2010-19.
Tuesday, July 31, 2012
Monday, July 30, 2012
If You Are Illegally Parked, Your Car Will be TOAD!
No commentary necessary. Other than to restate the note in its entirety that was displayed outside the daycare center:
"If you park in this parking lot and your not visiting our daycare your vehicle will be TOAD, learning academy
"If you park in this parking lot and your not visiting our daycare your vehicle will be TOAD, learning academy
Sunday, July 29, 2012
Irregardless
Well, thanks to YOU Ignorantics, this term is now in Merriam Webster as a "nonstandard". Once again, giving prominence to IGNORANCE.
Is this a losing battle? Are we losing the war against improper English usage? I need comfort...a hug...
Conversate
[long sigh]
Now, you see what you Ignorantics have done? You were so persistent in your use of this word that you have forced Merriam Webster to include it in their volume as a "nonstandard". This means that Merriam Webster has recognized IGNORANCE and given it prominence.
I am so mad at you all!!
Now, you see what you Ignorantics have done? You were so persistent in your use of this word that you have forced Merriam Webster to include it in their volume as a "nonstandard". This means that Merriam Webster has recognized IGNORANCE and given it prominence.
I am so mad at you all!!
Thursday, July 26, 2012
Idris Elba has a NEW NAME!
Today, I was shopping in the Rite-Aid and I overheard a humorous discussion between a man and his girlfriend. While in the ethnic hair section of the store, the man suddenly proclaimed " You know Baby, several people have told me lately that I look just like 'Interest Elba'"!
Interest Elba? Really? Well, after the girlfriend finished rolling her eyes and snickering at the obviously misplaced compliment [I won't bother describing him because other than the height and complexion, he looked nothing like Idris Elba], she asked him "You look like who?" He said "Interest Elba...Interest Elba from The Wire"! She snickered again and said "You mean, Idris Elba and you don't look like Idris or Interest!"
Interest Elba? Really? Well, after the girlfriend finished rolling her eyes and snickering at the obviously misplaced compliment [I won't bother describing him because other than the height and complexion, he looked nothing like Idris Elba], she asked him "You look like who?" He said "Interest Elba...Interest Elba from The Wire"! She snickered again and said "You mean, Idris Elba and you don't look like Idris or Interest!"
"Jolly" Braids...Isn't this "Sweet"?
Monday, July 23, 2012
The Torch Bearer's Olympic Mistake
- A 54-year old woman from Atlanta got so wrapped up in her role as an Olympic torchbearer that she decided to get a tattoo to celebrate it. She should have gone to a different artist. Jerri Peterson intended to get a tattoo of an Olympic torch with the Olympic logo, the words “Olympic Torch Bearer” above the logo and “London” below it. She got most of what she asked for with only one minor issue — “Olympic” was spelled “Oylmpic.” Whoops
Link: http://olympics.yardbarker.com/blog/olympics/article/olympic_torchbearer_has_tattoo_misspelled_as_oylmpic/11255746
Sunday, July 22, 2012
What is Your Budget for the Physical Year?
Ladies and gents, this is how it all began. I was sitting in a College meeting and the former dean started the meeting by saying she wanted to "talk about the budget for the new physical year". At first, I thought she was trying to be funny because I could not imagine that a Dean , let alone a PhD., would talk like this.
Well, meeting after meeting, she kept dropping ignorantic bombs without warning, and at the end of every meeting, we all left bloodied and feeling assaulted. So for therapy and to soothe each other, we started a game. Write down every word Dean _____ butchers during the meetings, and sure enough, by the end of every meeting, we all had a pretty lengthy list. Now that she no longer works at our University, I can call her out and thank her for being the inspiration for this Blog.
Well, meeting after meeting, she kept dropping ignorantic bombs without warning, and at the end of every meeting, we all left bloodied and feeling assaulted. So for therapy and to soothe each other, we started a game. Write down every word Dean _____ butchers during the meetings, and sure enough, by the end of every meeting, we all had a pretty lengthy list. Now that she no longer works at our University, I can call her out and thank her for being the inspiration for this Blog.
Saturday, July 21, 2012
Welcome to CHEEZEcake Factory!
Ok, so I am out and about tonight (had to blog this from the restaurant 'cause it's so darn WRONG) and we decided to have dinner at the Cheesecake Factory. We entered the restaurant, got on the wait list, and waited about twenty minutes. Then suddenly, one of the hostesses approaches our group and says "Welcome to CHEEZEcake Factory! You may be sitted". Well, the other three ladies in my party started following her to the table, and I just stood there stunned that this child assaulted the word "seated" and dare try to make it past tense...she came back to the front of the restaurant where I stood stunned and she repeated "Ma'am, you may be sitted" So, I told her "I'd rather be seated, if you don't mind"....and for that comment, I received a BLANK STARE, a pause, then a smile [she didn't get it].
...but before I go, how many of y'all pronounce "cheese" like "cheeze"? *hollering*
...but before I go, how many of y'all pronounce "cheese" like "cheeze"? *hollering*
Why Spell Check Won't Help an Ignorantic
“This is my outline for _________. It is not a detailed outline, mostly because I do not work well without lines. However, as I further develop the outline, I will email you my progress.”
“I would like to know if I am aloud to miss class today. I have a doctor’s appointment.”
And then:"Judith, I just wanted to let you know that I am preying for you and your father…Hey Seuss is a wonderful healer…”
“I know that you have been threw alock, so please know that my prayers are with you and your family”
Who Knew That an Ignorantic Could Also Be a Races
WOW...just wow. Could it possibly get any worse than this? If anyone retweeted this, I am going to put them on Ignorantics.
Friday, July 20, 2012
Tuesday, July 17, 2012
It's a Bible Brawl: Call the Shaff!!!
Monday, July 16, 2012
That is a Deep Cut, I Hope You Had a Technique Shot!
When you are a child, you get a tetanus shot and as an adult, you have to get one every few years, but it takes an Ignorantic to recognize that there is skill to giving these shots...a certain finesse...technique...So, ignorantically speaking, while we get a tetanus shot, they will still be in line waiting for their technique shot.
Carry on...
Carry on...
Thursday, July 12, 2012
There is a NEW Apocolips Theme Park!!!
Really? I wish it was that simple Boo...but you Ignorantics are no longer allowed to spell phonetically. You have to spell an actual word; one that is in a dictionary.
Here's a clue: If you type the word and wait a few seconds and suddenly a red squiggly line appears under your "made-up" word, then right click the word and a list appears with some suggestions for the correct spelling. If this doesn't help, then go back to my original Ignorantic cheat that I posted in 2010. Google "apocolips"...wait a few seconds and this will appear at the top of your search "Showing results for Apocalypse" EUREKA!!!!
Now, don't you feel much better!
Here's a clue: If you type the word and wait a few seconds and suddenly a red squiggly line appears under your "made-up" word, then right click the word and a list appears with some suggestions for the correct spelling. If this doesn't help, then go back to my original Ignorantic cheat that I posted in 2010. Google "apocolips"...wait a few seconds and this will appear at the top of your search "Showing results for Apocalypse" EUREKA!!!!
Now, don't you feel much better!
Wednesday, July 11, 2012
The Ignorantic Philosopher is at it Again!
I wonder how many brain cells he used for this synergy? Is this supposed to be metaphoric? analogous? philosophical? Lawd, Tyrese...I beg you to stay handsome, keep singing, and keep acting because every time you get philosophical, I swear the lights go out in Los Angeles! It's just too much!
Tuesday, July 10, 2012
This Heatwave is Making Ignorantics Innovative!
Ok...I see the window air conditioner...and look how it was installed; just like it would be installed if that was actually a window in a home. I guess the passenger on that side does not need to see out of the window (as long as they stay cool).
Now, I could not ignore the generator on the trunk. Does the battery work in the car or are they using the generator as a battery? Is this there home while the power is out? a mobile cooling center?
Can this get any more ignorant? Don't answer that!
Now, I could not ignore the generator on the trunk. Does the battery work in the car or are they using the generator as a battery? Is this there home while the power is out? a mobile cooling center?
Can this get any more ignorant? Don't answer that!
Monday, July 9, 2012
I Wonder if Love & Hip Hop Atlanta Will have Any Long Jeopardy!
Tonight, Erica Dixon's Mama made a reference to having some
"long jeopardy"...pause [sigh] Really Mama? Long Jeopardy? If you keep talking like that, I doubt that this show will have any longevity! but then again, it probably will...
Carry on...
More Ignorantic Tattoos
I just love the stars tattooed around the error to accentuate the mistake...Wait, it is extra puffy around the "lity" Was the tattoo artist confused, paused, and thought it looked just fine or did her skin become irritated because this is so darn ignorant!
Sunday, July 8, 2012
Hennyous Crimes Should be Punishable By Deaf!
Unfortunately, crime is no stranger to the daily news. Every day we hear about brutal crimes that are truly senseless.
This next Ignorantic is fed up with the crime. He is tired of turning on the daily news and hearing about these senseless acts of violence. The recent case of the man who committed cannibalistic acts towards a homeless man in Florida really got him ticked. He texted his cousin and began his typo rant: "...all these hennyous crimes make no sense, I think these criminals who commit hennyous crimes should be punishable by deaf!
Really? I think you were drinking some Henny when you texted this message? and furthermore, do they really have to lose their hearing because they committed these "hennyous" crimes? Isn't that cruel and "unuseful"..oops, I mean unusual?
Carry on...
This next Ignorantic is fed up with the crime. He is tired of turning on the daily news and hearing about these senseless acts of violence. The recent case of the man who committed cannibalistic acts towards a homeless man in Florida really got him ticked. He texted his cousin and began his typo rant: "...all these hennyous crimes make no sense, I think these criminals who commit hennyous crimes should be punishable by deaf!
Really? I think you were drinking some Henny when you texted this message? and furthermore, do they really have to lose their hearing because they committed these "hennyous" crimes? Isn't that cruel and "unuseful"..oops, I mean unusual?
Carry on...
None of the Less...
[Blank stare] Is it possible to have "none of the less"? Is this a measurement of some sort?
Our next Ignoranctic used this phrase in a research paper for a class assignment. Its perplexing, isn't it?
Nonetheless, I will move on...
Our next Ignoranctic used this phrase in a research paper for a class assignment. Its perplexing, isn't it?
Nonetheless, I will move on...
Wednesday, July 4, 2012
Tonight's Candlelight Visual is in Honor Of...
They say that most people are very visual, and that the smell and sight of candles can be very mesmerizing BUT have you ever been to a candlelight "visual"?
Apparently, one Ignorantic has, and he has been attending the "visuals" for years because he is always talking about it. These events must have had a profound effect on him. Very enlightening...
Apparently, one Ignorantic has, and he has been attending the "visuals" for years because he is always talking about it. These events must have had a profound effect on him. Very enlightening...
Tuesday, July 3, 2012
He is the Epiphany of FINE!
Really? You Ignorantics need to stay off Twitter and Facebook because folks are turning you in for stuff like this!
By the way, Boris is fine but that ain't no epiphany [grammar slur intentional]; it's just a fact! Kudos though for spelling epiphany right.
By the way, Boris is fine but that ain't no epiphany [grammar slur intentional]; it's just a fact! Kudos though for spelling epiphany right.
Monday, July 2, 2012
There's a NEW Weight Loss Program: Wait Washers?
I hear that when on this program, you can't WAIT to WASH all those pounds away!..[sigh] from Dumbest Tweets of the Day
Sunday, July 1, 2012
My Lecric Bill Has Been High Since This Heatwage Began!
Today's Ignorantic post is a double-doozy inspired by family Ignorantics over all this heat on the east coast.
Our first Ignorantic, a grandmother, is scared because she does not know how she is going to pay her "lecric bill" during this heatwave.
Our second Ignorantic and a repeat "offenser" on this Blog is know for talking about her "electwisity" bill!
Lawd, betwixt and between all these Ignorantics over heat is are folks fit to be tongue tied over all these Ignorantics.
The elderly can butcher some English, but you gotta love grandma, right? Y'all stay cool out there in this "heatwage"!
Our first Ignorantic, a grandmother, is scared because she does not know how she is going to pay her "lecric bill" during this heatwave.
Our second Ignorantic and a repeat "offenser" on this Blog is know for talking about her "electwisity" bill!
Lawd, betwixt and between all these Ignorantics over heat is are folks fit to be tongue tied over all these Ignorantics.
The elderly can butcher some English, but you gotta love grandma, right? Y'all stay cool out there in this "heatwage"!
You Got Me Hyp-ma-tized....Birth of Ignorantics???
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